Active Listening

“Waiting for an experience elicits more happiness than waiting for a material good”

Jacob Morgan

Jacob Morgan is the author of The Future of Work - a book about the changes that take place in the world of work and how the trends are impacting the way people work, managers lead and organizations change their structure. He also wrote The Collaborative Organization - a book that is on my ”to read list”.

In an article on Medium he writes about BUILD - a model that you can use to practice Active Listening.

B- comes from body language - and if I learn anything from my years in public speaking there is no great conversation if your words don’t match with the information your body is sending. I have no idea where I have read that if your body doesn’t support your message the other person receives only 7% of the information. So pay attention to your posture in every conversation.

U - Understanding - here is the magic of a healthy conversation - to stop your inner voices and to focus on what the other person says and how it says it. Listen to understand not to reply. Bring your mind into the conversation even if it flies away to other duties of the day. Bring it back into the conversation so you can remember that it was discussed.

I - Interrupting - one way of breaking the connection with the person in front of you. In a conversation you are in a partnership with the other person so allow them the space and give them the time to share what matters to them. Since your message is not more important than theirs.

L - comes from Look them in the eye - if you want to build a connection with the person in front of you looking them in the eye is one of the tools that comes handy. Could be difficult especially for introverts but it can be a nice reminder to be present and don’t let your mind wonder.

D - don’t judge. Being empathic with your conversational partner - stop your assumptions and judgments and just listen to their words, tone, their values and beliefs - be curious and offer a safe space for the conversation.

Tomorrow is Monday - a perfect day to start experiencing a meaningful conversation that starts with ”How was your weekend?”